[Hey, that's a good sigh, so he'll take it. And he's had his share of "chugging drinks way too fast" in his life, so it's not like he's being a hypocrite here.]

It's all about what you put in it. Put something sweet and fruity in, get something sweet and fruity out. I can tell you right now you won't want anything with whisky or bourbon in it unless you're a masochist.